20jun08people
Missing Person Alert: Aamir Khan, age 42, colour fair, cropped hair.
Dear All
With great regret I inform you that my Idol Aamir Khan is missing. I don’t know where he went. Please help me find him – I’ll be grateful.
Here is some information that will help you identify him:
Physical Characteristics
- Color: Fair
- Height: 5’5”
- Age: 42
- Hair: Cropped
Behavioural Characteristics
- Leads an extremely private life; rarely appears on television
- Is very careful what he says in public; his interviews are punctuated with long ums and ahs
- Is extremely choosy with endorsements; endorses only the classist of products
- Makes only one film at a time
- Is not very social; doesn’t go for film premiers and parties
He was last seen in December 2007. Since then there has been no knowledge of his whereabouts. Anyone who finds him will be rewarded with lots of love and good wishes from me and many others like me.
Please be warned, however, that in your quest to find him, you might come across another person who claims to be Aamir Khan and shares the same physical characteristics. He has been seen since the time the real Aamir has been missing. But this faux-Aamir is every different. He…
- Is now seen on TV every now and then. He even cut his birthday cake in front of TV cameras and revealed that his wife gave him a nice birthday card
- Is so naïve that he openly jokes about his pet dog being named Shahrukh, apparently not foreseeing even once the inevitable media frenzy over such a comment
- Is endorsing Monaco biscuits
- Is shooting one film and producing two others at the same time
- Was seen at the premier of Race – a hardcore masala film; claims that he likes the work of Abbas – Mustan (the masters of masala, often trash, films)
Don’t be fooled by this fake Aamir. Please find the real Aamir for me. However, if you do bump into the faux-Aamir, please do me a favour. Ask him a simple question:
WHY?